So it’s been about 2 months since I have checked in here. There is so much to say. Let’s start with I am feeling good. That’s a great place to be. This surgery was huge but also reminded me how small I am as well. A lot of surviving hardship is about “surrender” – a lot happens we don’t expect, and when we resist , it becomes even tougher. This time I surrendered and am very pleased with things.
The time I’ve had off to focus on self care has been wonderful. My soul feels like I gave myself the space and energy it deserved to get through this hurdle. The tumors came out clean, pathology came out great and I have spent my time resting, binging on a new found love for television and a reignited old flame, pinterest. I realised that I haven’t felt RESTFUL in so long. No wonder I was constantly anxious and stressed out.
This experience has been a shift and a gift. I hope you all enjoyed the instagram takeover from my dear friend Meri from @gardensofthesun
If you missed her residency here are some outtakes!
“The bug soap is my daughter’s absolute fave. She loves the subtle scent, the soft lilac color and how she can let it fly over the tub. Next up I hope to give her one of Beth’s golden buddha soaps! Has anyone tried those yet? – Meri”
“Bali life is pretty good. As in, it’s amazing. I’m grateful for every single second of it. And the tub is definitely a bonus When we still lived in Java I got dengue fever and typhoid a few times. You just get sick a bit easier here in the tropics. We didn’t have hot water for years, and when we left I knew I wanted to move to house with a bath for the days we get ill. When the soreness and the aching gets into your bones and your knuckles, and it hurts even to lie down, nothing is more relieving than a nice warm bath. And a little self-care on the weekends never hurts! – Meri”
“The salt scrub is my absolute fave. This is my third bag of the most divine smelling salts. Beth, you can never ever stop making these!!! -Meri”
“I’ve been a raving fan of BethKaya for several years now. I still remember my very first purchase from Beth – the warm vanilla fig perfume oil mixed with little rough gems. I keep coming back to this scent, it’s the one that got me hooked. Do you remember your first purchase from Beth? -Meri”
“The gemstones hidden inside the soaps are the best thing ever! It’s like a little surprise. The tumbled stone is slowly revealing itself from the Brandied Pear & Lemon Poppy Soap. Can you guess what stone it is? -Meri”
“How does Beth even dream up all these wonderful combinations?! I mean citrus, basil, vanilla and mint! Amethyst, lavender and orange! – Meri”
What a beautiful tone to return to!
I still need a few weeks to get my act and line up together. But my focus is centered on re-invigorated intentions – tones like Citrus, Ginger, Orchid, Artic, Mint , Guava, Coconut and Rain,. I will lean on those myself to get my physical capacity back up to where it once was again then design self care pearls for the shop.
On another note some; and by some I mean a “paraphrased few” of my words were published in an article “sort of” about self care in Refinery29 – you can find the article here:
It’s ironic that a little self pampering and love is exactly what I needed for so long considering this is what my offerings are rooted within. Sending you all the best the ides of march has to offer and thank you for many of your supports.
Makeup can be the difference between feeling undead
And human again
A bra is motivation to do something
House work ?
A scar below the bikini line seeing with two stab wound eyes in the belly and a belly button puncture for a nose
Can mean weight or weightless
And a prayer you’ll never forget how hard the fight is
Over the last few years I’ve noticed this little insidious thing on social media. There is a lack of willingness to foster authentic relationships. We are full of short cuts & tear downs. No one is here to make sure anyone else makes the climb, and no one is here to make sure others don’t. What I mean by that is the “digital bullying” has to end and the digital soap boxing is tired.
No one is more deserving of ANYTHING than anyone else, if you are working hard on your own path.
I have made a few foes along the way in this business. Most of them have come from quite literally me being assertive or up front. The receiving end decided that because of that, I am not worthy anymore. That is TOTALLY ok. What is not OK, is ganging up on me. It is not ok to be working behind closed doors to actively tear me or other people down. This is happening so much it’s sickening. I see it all over facebook, instagram and also emerging platforms.
You know what I am talking about! The screen grabs, the gossip, the “please don’t like this person because they did XYZ to me”. Everyone has their own truth. Honor that truth. I can be a villain to you if that is your truth, and you can be one to me too. That is OUR business. People have done terrible things to me on the way. I’ve wanted to put them on blast so many times. Oh the dirty bloggers who solicited free stuff never to deliver the promised promotions, or the bitch cliques that just don’t like me because of whatever reason and won’t even sniff in my direction. OK fair enough, we don’t vibe I guess but are we so caught up in relationship shortcuts that we can’t talk things out? – That we don’t give people first chances let alone second ones? – That any expression of anything but positivity or even pseudo positivity is a confrontation we can’t handle anymore? Subsequently the tidal wave response of shunning occur. This is bullshit. I’m sorry, I have to call it out.
Learn to have a two way conversation with people. I can’t tell you how many times I have not been worth that in the last year. True colors are a blessing in disguise but at the end of the day, sometimes it can turn into bullying, exclusions and ganging up. Let people discover each other without your interference. Thank You.
A client and acquaintance wrote me a letter that they didn’t want to associate with me because of something another person in the business arena said about me. Gee that seems fair? I didn’t even defend myself. I had bought this person’s art, I supported and cherished the digital connection I thought we had. I was genuine in fostering it. Who’s right is it to impune on my relationships, and even business because of a situation they had with me? Frankly and truthfully, a situation that actually had me on the end of the back stabbery but like many times in my life if you’re not even given a chance, it’s just not worth the argument. IfI was approached in a way that allowed me a chance to speak my truth, bridges could be built and this has been sitting on my heart. Ultimately, I have thousands of happy customers to put my faith on for the moment to sail me through the insecurity this causes me, naturally. This was also the second incident in the same month involving a customer who seemed to have expectations of me and a relationship I really didn’t fully grip. Could we not project so much onto internet friends?
I’m not going to be awesome to everyone, not everyone is awesome to me.
There are also some issues I have with just trolling for inspirations, rips, cherry picking customers to the point of following my family members to do so, none of this is good karma, and all of this will put you on the outs with me, personally.
We all have a right to lay out our boundaries and be respected. If you’re not respected as a pattern, you drop the axe. It took me SO long to realize it was OK to do that. To those people, I might be a villain and that is their truth. I honor that truth. Infecting others with your truth is kind of like mind washing. It’s unfair and it creates unspoken wars. I see this happening all the time among my personal peers, business peers and just from a distance – especially online.
This is getting us no where as a society. It’s not your responsibility to tear anyone down even if they have hurt you. Your responsibility is to nurture your highest purpose and perhaps even others’.
It’s also time to stop being afraid of our confrontations and learn to use a little more tact. Myself totally included! Speak up when you need to and pipe down when it’s time. If it’s not helpful, why go there? How about the just plain out of no where rude or hurtful comments from trolling scrollers? Why is this part of the fabric of digital bullying now too? Slow snipes ad up. Just don’t be that jerk.
I also want to mention, as a business owner it’s illegal to slander someone causing them to lose business to a potential customer. In writing, the proof of such is actionable. Does anyone need anymore reasons to put their words in a box before offering them? (@thisthatandthese taught me that trick!)
Here’s to better relationships, truest colors and brightest intentions, there is no dry run for this. We are living this now – every day is a chance to make advances and set better intentions.
I was happy to say goodbye to 2016. I think so many people were. It was like a whole internet thing. Now 2017 is here and I’ve stepped on a few rakes already. I guess perhaps no one should blame an entire YEAR for what is actually LIFE.
So I have a surgery date on the map , 2/9 – this month will be filled with pre op tests and also focused production for a final push in my shop before I go on a hiatus. I have NO idea what that will look like. There are so many questions, but all of it is unknown. I must get to the other side, and I will.
There’s a quiet calm right now flowing through my fingertips. This is where great design comes from. I know that the beauty in my life comes from source. There was a lot of loss this past year for me. In bad and good ways.
Some of those ways purely sat on my attitude. I hardened. There were moments coming up in this business where knives went into my back. I am still climbing, always climbing. There’s always a new view to find and there’s always unstable ground.
With all of this the blaring message is clear to me and where I want my work to continue to evolve towards. SELF CARE is paramount. The items I create are rooted in self care and the take away is that no one can be whole, without nourishing their minds, bodies and souls. My customers come to me for this and I want to bring more than ever to the table in this sense. But first I have to take care of my health and see where I land. Its totally a crapshoot waiting game. I am planning things, with beautiful people and I feel really confident that in 2017 I will have a HUGE announcement.
Follow me at SELF CARE CAFE on Instagram. My dear friend and alliance with this project Michelle will be co hosting this with me. The goal is to promote healthy self care rituals, products, meals and brands, for now ;).
Thanks for checking back in and supporting my work!
Here’s the deal, I have had a tremendous amount of difficulty with my words and footing lately. There is a lot going on in the world that is tough to swallow. Emphatically this is all too heavy and heart wrenching. Almost 2 weeks ago, a radical asshole shot up a club with people inside. This happens too much.
I can’t process this in any other way . I made some art.
This piece of art is screaming at me. I wanted to make a donation to the PULSE victims club in the wake of the tragic shooting, but felt guilty about the small impact a small donation really has. So I thought, well – I’ll put what I was going to donate into the art, and that will be my donation – and my peers will get a symbol to share and plaster every where out of this and together we can forge a bigger drop in the bucket a message and even a donation.
I created this sticker and it’s here – I have 50 to start
I hope to sell out and drop a chunk of love off to :
^^^ by all means donate directly. – Of your donation to buy the sticker, apart from processing fees (from paypal, credit cards, and postage) – the remainder will go towards the group donation.
If I sell all 50 – I’ll do another run! Maybe I will put it towards another crisis situation that needs LOVE or keep it flowing towards this group. I don’t know, I know people need help, and to see love and be love everywhere and I don’t like to feel helpless. My peers helped in the wake of Hurricane Sandy in ways that one a grassroots level moved mountains. Those are the people I associate with. Lets move another mountain.
Even in shadow, we can be love. Things happen that are ugly, we cannot pretend they don’t happen. This is an age old battle. We need to confront these this and stand up for what counts.
Be sure to check out that TAB on my site brand new up in the navigation drop down on BethKaya Boutique! Tweaks all over!
If you find the cards in your order or purchase and post them on social media use hashtag #BethKayaHarmonyCards so I can see!
Own it, all of it And don’t say sorry. – BethKaya #bethkaya photo by @jeremysgordon
A wise man Robert Anton Wilson once said:
“A true initiation never ends. ”
-It doesn’t ever end and we tell ourselves;
” when it slows down”, “when we are over the hump”, “when we have more money”, “when there is more time”, “this will pass”
But ask yourself if any of these thought limitations serve your purpose? Honestly, and this is something that has been hard for me to accept. Life is a series of initiations, there is ALWAYS going to be something to step over and accept.
Accepting right now, the timing of everything and where you are and where you are going is kind of hard when you are full of drive, ideas, and goals. One thing at a time – we are all undergoing deep initiations all of the time. Some of us are tra la la along and don’t writhe through these tides, and some of us come in and out of skin again and again. Both are acceptable but resistance, resistance is what leads to suffering. I resist, I am not telling anyone how to live life on my blog but rather live life through thought and process, consciously. This is how I am coping too. Post surgery, Post Winter, Post latest initiation.
My blog has been having issues the last month as well so I haven’t been able to update as much as I would like but it works again and now I’ve learned about blog security! Yay! I will be posting more often because I have my keys to this car back – and I feel like they are out of my hands sometimes on social media. A lot of people want to cash in on you if they think you’re successful at something. I have been successful and I am glad. That’s all because of you and me. I put in a lot of work and GRIT to get to this place and no one is sailing over here. It’s hard work every day.
“Reality is always plural and mutable.” – #robertantonwilson
I’m glad to finally feel confidence in what I have done and am doing. It’s a yellow brick road. There are lots of twists but you posses that power all along you just have to journey for it. Additionally while I have been climbing I have I holed up for a while and it’s never a great idea to hide yourself away so I am trying to get out there and just good old fashioned be WITH people again.
Remember that? Before our phones stood like a study carol between fun and who we love? Before I lost the last 2 years of sleep gritting out my business?It’s a weird climate to flesh out as a person, a mom and an entrepreneur.
My latest initiation is calling for this , the presence, the present, being present. The NJ shore has a lot of things to do and the locals are doing their part to make it interesting. More details THERE too coming soon. I just signed on to do the SOULSATIONAL festival here on the shore this summer and will have more details on that soon along with other events.
Going Home to @atmanandayoga in NYC My New Yorker contingency can shop in person there next week! Very excited, ️beautiful studio downtown! ⚡️ #yoga #crystalinfused #natural #holistic #shamanic #intentional #lifestyle #art #joy #passion
As winter comes to a close I have developed and honed well loved products and listened to your feedback. Thank you for your photos on all of your reviews and for your words of support and encouragement. BethKaya also became proudly insured members of the Handmakers Soap and Cosmetic Guild – and I am building out my presence in shops, boutiques and retail fronts all over the world! I just landed product in Australia, The UK and set up shop at a place in NYC. (**I keep stopping myself from writing “our” presence – who is our? I am just ME – It is ALL done by 1 person!**)
If you’re still reading this, please join this group because my facebook is kind of broken unless I pay for you to see it. It’s been a long road to break through and getting to a point of substantial social media growth and feeling it censored by advertisers is an objective to overcome.
Content from my actual BethKaya page must be paid to promote for you to see it. How authentic is that really? Do you want to see “sponsored” in the corner of my all of my artwork? I refuse, honestly. Give it to who wants it, feed it to who will eat it – take it or leave it.
I am happy to report that my deck of harmony cards went to print and its coming! 17 cards in all front with a unique intentional crystal grid and the back with a self growth mantra ! I have passed out 250 in orders and on a few tables as promised and am almost completely out of them!
That entire set of cards is available on preorder HERE.
Those will be out in just a few weeks as well. All preorders will come with a mandala sticker and sacred geo tats. Self publishing is super expensive and I uploaded all of the artwork to redbubble to help offset the costs. I’ve ordered from them to support my girl Mal at WingostarrJewelry ! The products are quality! Check out my SHOP tab for etsy and redbubble items and here is a lil preview of the redbubble jams.
Stay tuned to just more here and you know I OWN this and despite being hacked twice (touche) I just need to work with these tools and survive like businesses used to before the internet. How’s that for a BethKaya Spring Preview? Eh, playing by the rules is boring.
What does this make you feel?
Box By JDrew Carpentry and Photo By BethKaya.
Feel free to always reach out by etsy chat or BethKaya AT Gmail.com
New Things to Look For in my Etsy Shop:
“Lunar Divide” “Crystal Lips ” Awakened Eyes”
✨New Under Eye Oil ✨ #AwakenedEyes #crystalinfused #ByBethKaya “Awake. Shake dreams from your hair My pretty child, my sweet one. Choose the day and choose the sign of your day The day’s divinity First thing you see. A vast radiant beach in a cool jeweled moon Couples naked race down by it’s quiet side And we laugh like soft, mad children Smug in the wooly cotton brains of infancy The music and voices are all around us. Choose they croon the Ancient Ones The time has come again Choose now, they croon Beneath the moon Beside an ancient lake Enter again the sweet forest Enter the hot dream Come with us Everything is broken up and dances.” -The Ghost Song, #TheDoors
So naturally this is the time of year to consider that little romantic holiday. Some suggest it was invented by hallmark to sell cards, but there is obviously a lineage and lore associating in so many ways to different countries and cultures, dating back hundreds of year all over the world for St. Valentines Day. I got a little curious and decided to go on a little internet book report style scavenger hunt. Here are some totally serious and maybe a few BS stats I found from sources that range from CNN to random Joe Smith blogger!
The Stats –
-More than 35 Million Heart Shaped Boxes of Chocolate Will Be Sold For Valentines Day
-Over 110 Million Roses Will be Sold Over the 3 Days That Valentines Day Falls
-Women Purchase 85% of All Valentines
-3% of Pet Owners Will Treat Their Pets On Valentines Day
-In the USA – 65% of Men Do Not Make Valentine’s Day Plans in Advance
– 21 % of Consumers Will Spend $4.8 Billion on Jewelry This Year
– 60% of Valentines Given Are To Family While 20% are Given to Teachers (The Third Highest Group)
-One Third of Valentines Consumers Will Purchase Gifts for Loved Ones From Tablets
-2 Billion Dollars Will be Spent On Candy This Year
-50 Million Dollars Will Be Spend On Jewelry This Year
Speaking such expenditures a few of my fellow conscious energy warriors have pitched in to provide a group special for our shops collectively!
*Click * Directly on Our Names to Be Directed Straight To Our Etsy shops!
USE CODE : LOVE2016
Use this code in any of our three shops and you will get $5 off your entire order over $20. **ALSO upon ordering from my shop, if you provide proof of prior purchase from our trio, you will automatically receive a Faithful Grace crystal infused sample fragrance with your order.
So feast your eyes on a romantic preview of seasonal delights any Valentine would be delighted to receive!
Make your own yummy status up this season! Got any fun Valentine’s Day Facts to share? Comment !
Vitality Arsenal – Essential Oil Blend By Vetiver Farms Hawaii, Stones by Wingostarr Jewelry , Gem Roll On Perfume & Orgone By BethKaya, Flower Tincture and Balm by Honest Owl Herbal, Bowls By Intralove Art Solid Lotion Tin By Earth Collective
Getting back into the swing of things, the thick of winter – new structure for the shop. Slowly healing, getting myself back – taking it in stride and pulling all of my newest lessons into view.
Keeping loyal friends, and honest – well makers in my own healing & vitality arsenal. Producing now on a farm to table like scale – every few weeks I am writing a menu of sorts – assessing my herbs and flowers / raw materials and designing these ritual bath hues for you and myself really.
I’ve enjoyed partaking in all of this season’s products as they are developed and truthfully need these nourishment tools. There is nothing in a day that you do solely for yourself but your grooming rituals.
Sometimes those rituals can be the difference between “put together” and “falling apart”. A simple shower in the middle of a crisis, after trauma or whatever can sew a person up – make you anew, almost like a sunrise.
I cling to those moments somedays. Feeling so much, being able to lose myself in a silly little ritual of applying eyeliner or blush. It reboots.
Holding sacred space and crushing external and internal expectations has been paramount to the healing and creative process for me as a person. Especially lately – what things do you do to reboot yourself and set aside a sactuary?
Sacred Loose Smudge Blend – For Cleaning Sacred Spaces and Removing Bad Juju
A lot of my work if you haven’t gathered is centered around these sacred space and self ritual functions. My goal is to make them nourishing and enhanced.
Speaking of enhanced, if you are one of my Portland Oregon friends, please check out my Cannabis Flower & Fig Scents found at FARMA a beautiful luxury recreational and medicinal cannabis boutique. Those hues are unisex and a customer and now FARMA PDX favorite!
Feel free to comment before with your thoughts! Approaching 20K subscriber on Instagram – I think that is just silly and wonderful. Thank you so much whoever is out there for the support.
When I do hit 20K I will be giving this orgone and gemstone parcel away to a lucky following who has shared it with the hashtag #BethKaya20K.
Follow me at @bethkaya on instagram and also @butterflywellnessbeth
Facebook – BethKaya / The Butterfly Wellness Project
#BethKaya20K – Orgone & Gem Parcel Giftback for 20K Subscribers
I would love to hear about some of the events you have on tap too this coming spring /summer. Starting to map out my travel / vending routes!
Happy 2016! I am wholly not sure if anyone reads my blog. I chase the digital streets in a lot of corners so who knows where I shed traction or not. Surely the last year has been explosive for my @BethKaya instagram account but I ALSO notice funny things happening with it because of that. I won’t go there but it’s also been a source of new growth.
So I had a gnarly surgery to remove a large mass that grew in my breast and side recently. It is NOT cancer – but it was a 3″ edenoma/fibrocystic/calcium mass that doesn’t exactly scream out “I’m Healthy!” and caused me a lot of infections and discomfort in my muscles and ducts. So it came out and I am recovering OK. It’s been a process I will not lie. My dominant arm was affected by the surgery and that wasn’t exactly anticipated. I’ve had to look at some parts of myself internally and externally and confront those things. The business has been a huge experiment and test as a person, artist, mother, wife and friend. It’s also been a test of balance, of my love for YOU and what I do with intention. It means so much to me, it’s my sacred path. Not everyone gets it, not everyone got it last year – and I experienced losses soley do to misalignment in life path / structure with others and that is OK. We are not all aligned at once, or in the same sequence at the same time. I do believe that our relationships and insights change as we experience life and we are constantly evaluating the worth of things we do and the reward/benefit to doing them.
Photo By Rebecca Tost from @SeedEssentials – “CONNECTION TO SOURCE – Father of Earth “- Featuring Sacred Smudge By BethKaya & Twin Selenite Towers
This is all very leveling. I know that as I stare down a road to healing it won’t be overnight. Also – moving ahead I must be even more critical of what goes in my body, just as I am about what goes on it. Everything is sobering and only ads to my resolve. So the shop is closed for a few more days. When I reopen it will flow a little differently. Inventory will be real time and customs will not be offered at the moment. I have a LOT of stock that I made, especially leading up to the procedure. Maybe I had an intuitive hunch after all on my arm but that is where I will lie when I reopen. Premade! I hope you all had a great new year. Setting intentions – healthy healthy is all I can think about right now! Follow along on facebook if you wish – join in the conversation and participation. Lifestyle is everything to vitality! This forum is about sharing, accountability and most of all living well.